1) At an Optometrist's office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
2) In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there hungry. Come on in and get fed up."
3) In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."
4) On a Plumber's Shop:
"We repair what your husband fixed."
5) On the trucks of a Plumbing Company:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call us."
6) Pizza Shop Slogan:
"7 days without pizza makes one weak."
7) At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout."
8) On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:
"Hello. Can we pick your nose?"
9) At a Towing company:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
10) Another Pizza shop slogan:
"Buy our pizza. We knead the dough."
11) On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."
12) In a Nonsmoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and put you out."
13) On a Septic Tank Truck sign:
"We're #1 in the #2 business."
14) On a Taxidermist's window:
"We really know our stuff."
15) On a Fence:
"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."
16) At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment."
17) Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."
18) In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"We'll be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
19) At a New Orleans waste disposal company:
"Our business is picking up, but it still stinks."
20) At the Electric Company:
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be de-Lighted."